What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
Last Updated: 20.06.2025 10:10
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
I write beautiful poetry .
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
I waited trembling.
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
She found it foreign!.
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
I had hoped to write a book about this .
Which race of women are the hottest?
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
My life is so biszare .
He resisted the act ,that day.
What was your first gay male experience?
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
I was 9 years of age.
Have you experimented with bestiality?
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
He was dying to do it , i knew.
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
Single-dose psilocybin therapy shows promise for reducing alcohol consumption - PsyPost
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
Who then, do I blame.?
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
Why do females hate MGTOW so much?
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
Why do many women wear sleeveless shirts, more so than men?
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
What are some reasons why people may fear strong men?
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
My family never makes their pension either.
The Highest Prices You Can Get For Pokémon TCG's Destined Rivals - Kotaku
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
I said to her
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
What is a good way to conduct an interview?
I know ,a lot about trauma.
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
These are the 10 open source Android apps I install on every new phone - Android Authority
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
I have no regrets .
Where the ultimate outsiders.
It was going to be , some day.
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
I was scared of men, in general
I don,t even have a pension.
I never cut or harmed myself..
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
So, i spoilt her more .
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
Put me off passion for life!!
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
She married twice! .
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
I couldn’t, believe it.
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
So whats the point in blame.
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
Would this be the day?
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
My mum and dad in the seventies!
They are buried together, in the same grave..
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
On the 31st of Jan this month .
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!
And i lived it daily.
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
This is how, and why children get BPD.
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
She loved him until the end.
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
Im still living with it.
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
I was very sick at this time too.
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
One cannot live in the past .
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
She was in good health!
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
What did i know ?
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
But, we were locked up after school.
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
As i do to all so called friends.?
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
I could never make a relationship work though!
But ive been too sick for many years..
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
(And it was in our own minds.)
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
Especially a lifetime of it.
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
I will be 64.
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
When she asked me how she looked .
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
Why did i forgive my father ?
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
We all went to grammer schools
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
And who doesn’t know suffering?
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
But it wasn’t much.
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
Ive learnt so much.
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
The only rule us 5 kids had .
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
All the time i was locked up.
Im dying but, im not bitter.
We were not on the streets..
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
This is soul school!.
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
She wouldn,t have been !
I was seconnd youngest,
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
Comes on , in middle age.
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
I think the readers, may guess!
He knew the spot.
I did it because my mum asked me too!
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .
Was to survive, this bastard.